September 20, 2012

Holiday cheer: Red Star Horoscope

Rebel Youth Magazine 

ARIES Mar 21|Apr 19

Kudos to University of Toronto students for cancelling your Annual General Meeting.  Don’t stop here, however. Why not abolish the student union altogether, and have the U of T administration run it? If this doesn't sound appealing to you, Aries, maybe today would be a good time to begin organizing a broad-based grass-roots student mobilization for access to education and push back against the right-wing bums on campus.

TAURUS Apr 20 | May 20

Because of some negative planetary alignments or perhaps because of the growing struggle against Bill 115, you may have done something mildly subversive for a high school student and recently supported a solidarity rally for your teachers. Good work, Taurus.  Remember: teach'urs workin' conditions are ur learn'un conditions.

GEMINI May 21 | Jun 20

You may be tempted to skip school and spray-paint revolutionary slogans around the town. Before you start, remember Upper Canada College in Toronto. At $52,990 per year (plus admission and other fees) this is where capitalists go to high school. Grads include Conrad Black and J.C. Eaton.  You probably agree we need to put corporations under control and build socialism, so Gemini, maybe its time for a google map search.

CANCER Jun 21 | Jul 22

Have you noticed the personality cult developing around Thomas Mulclair? Well, we haven't seen much personality but it sure seems culty the way NDPers are forgiving their leader for pushing that party further and further to the right. Time to check out joining the YCL...

LEO Jul 23 | Aug 22

Punk group Anti-Flag is calling all punks to vote. “I don’t think there is anything more punk than trying to better the world,” says Chris Barker. In Canada, a recent survey shows 78 percent of 18 to 20 year-olds don’t vote. Not surprisingly, “Didn’t Care,” No appealing Parties, and “Too busy” surviving were the main reasons. This election, Leo, be a shit-disturber with a solution and vote Communist.

VIRGO Aug 23 | Sep 22

This week, Virgo, you may be denounced by a Trotskyist group, or other ultra-leftists. Don’t worry.  There more important ideological battles. And can you take a group seriously when they call themselves by the initials 'Prats'?

SCORPIO Oct 23 | Nov 21

It’s true: Barbie dumped Ken. Eight years ago. Okay so we are a little out of date but really “Mattel should just admit what we’ve all suspected, that Ken is gay,” said a York University Professor. This week, Scorpio, do the same and dump that sweat-shop doll’s body-image.

SAGITTARIUS Nov 22 | Dec 21

Capitalism is inherently screwed-up. For example, minimum wage across Canada is way too low. A full-time minimum wage worker in Ontario earns at least $7000 below the poverty line each month. It is a good time to consider your relationship to the means of production, and join the fightback. Don’t sit there passively, Sagittarius, hoping that fate will be nice to you. See you in the struggle!

CAPRICORN Dec 22 | Jan 19

You might check out a movie soon. “The Corporation” has been on for a while, so you may want to see the Wolfgang Becker’s Film “Goob Bye, Lenin!” about East German “ostalgia.” Yes, it’s a way better film than “The Cat in the Hat.” But don’t be confused. This is still a petit-bourgeois critique of socialism done by people who benefit from the capitalist regime, but can’t ignore the fact things are now worse in the former East Germany.

AQUARIUS Jan 20 | Feb 18

If you are a young worker somebody might approach you with a union card soon.  Sign it. Lately, workers have organized a series of protests outside WalMart's across the United States calling for union rights. Organizing work places is an effective way to fightback against the capitalist class.

PISCES Feb 19 | Mar 20

It’s check-in time, Pisces. Have you been drinking too much beer? Did you know that Molson and Labatt have a duo-monopoly, taking in roughly 90 percent of Canadian beer sales? Your slogan should be: Beer for the people, not for profit! And let’s nationalize the NHL while we’re at it.

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